Litter Of The Month

00% Biker reserves the right to correct your teteorc^ers v^r^bored amJthere's nothing on ^eOWSrira^H^sr Kinnertön, Chester,

Dear 100% Biker,

Just got back from the Dominican (thanks Dad) and Kaz brought in my mag. She opened it and nearly pee'd herself laughing. Cheers guys! Might get her to wear the black basq ue to Into The Valley orget her pissed and send her over naked other than her helmet - she's daft enough!

Cheers Marra, seeyou at ITV. You might see Kaz first though! Mecca

Shall have Che camera ready and waiting! N.

Dear 100% Biker,

My wife and I would I ike to extend a big up, thankyou and respect to the bikers who turned upforthe Mother's Day Run through Wooton Bassett in tribute to all the people who religiously turn out whatever the weather to honour our heroes when they are brought backfrom Afghanistan. Has we known about it in time we would have tried to be there. It's events like this that should show non bikers that we are not all hooligans.

Also a big up and thankyou and a lot of respect for the people of Wooton Bassett for what you do. Are we the only people who think that the town should be given an official award in recognition of what they unselfishly doon an all to often basis? Although we live in Wales, we appreciate what you do. Dave & Joy Nash, Wrexham

Dear 100% Biker,

With regards to spoil in' the ballot slip at the vote (Editorial & Last Thing, issue 128), havin'done 'the count' on two occasions I know they are not even looked at by our 'masters', but only seen bythe'plebs'an' thus it don't make a flyin' fig to the condescending arse'oles. Flint

Dear 100% Biker,

Justaquicklettertothankall those who came on the Bury St. Edmunds MAG Mad Cows Easter Egg Run to the Scope centre in town. 89 bikes, many two-up, had a great run through the countryside, and the kids at Scope were eyes wide with the pile of eggs whilethe bikers were suitably stuffed by the great spread of food put on for us. The whip round netted a very credible£270t00.

Many thanks to Scope for their warm welcome, hope to see you at the Moo Summer Rally. BSE MAG Mad Cows

Dear 100% Biker,

To introduce myself, I am the founder of Army Bikers and I am very angry about the letteryou printed in the last edition of 100% Biker.

I would like it to be known that I, Doug of Army Bikers, had no way in any shape or form had anything to do with the SOS Xmas Parcel Run. Anyone who knowsmewould have known before they dropped their side stand that 1 had nothing got todo with this. It seems that Julian Shears is lookingfor his name to be mentioned in dispatches -1 thought the run was for the purpose of the troops, not to honour Julian Shears?

Well, Julian, you wanted your five minutes of fame, but fame comes with the respect of others. You state that 'some bloke in a in a red beret' was giving something to Karen Webster - that's very disrespectful, doyou call all old veterans 'old blokes in berets'? And then you called the plaque that I was giving to Karen 'something' - the plaque clearly shows that it is the insignia of the British Forces that is now reduced to 'something'. There's also the British flag clearly visible - that's now also reduced to just 'something', is it? It is a pity you did not read the wording underneath which is' respect'-something that you need to learn.

You should have listened to your chairman of the Royal British Legion and the Riders' Branch who told you to drop it. Well, Julian,you wanted fame and now you have got it - you're the first person to bring the RBL into a confrontation, and you will also be famous fordisrespectingthe British Forces and also disrespecting the British flag...

Doug, A proud to serve veteran

Dear 100% Biker,

Re: The Star Letter in issue 128 - the one from Julian Shears, the County Rep of the RBL R. This Shears character is not only wrong, insultin gand a total twat. I feel ittotally unfairand unreasonable for him to attack Doug Mangan in this way when Doug has done none of the things he states in his rude and personally disparaging letter regardingthe SOS Parcel Run last November. I can tellyou that Doug and his wife Ann work tirelessly for all ex-Forcescharitiesand for Doug to be insulted by this untrue drivel is outrageous.

I have now written a formal letter of compliant to the Chairman of the RBLR and I am confident that he wil I conclude that Shears is out of order and has harmed the name and reputation of the RBLR, and is generallyadick! Glenn Freakley, Richmond

Dear 100% Biker,

Hel lo, I am lost in the world of the biker -1 have even had people tel I me I ain't a biker. Seen all the writing and the t-shirts, even had aguy say just 'coz ya wear colour-coordinated leather don't make you a biker. What the hell is that all about? Shit, 1 don't even wear a leather jacket. Hell, I did when I was in my twenties and I can remember how bloody wet I got and how damn cold I was as well. Never used gloves either.

Only transport I had then was my old C15 BSA, blown head nuts and leakingoil round the rocker cover. But then I got me an A7 500 BSA plunger frame, turned that little gem into a chop with home made girders - one good thing about being a tool maker, make all the bitsyou want. Then went on to the Ai o 650, yes, she got chopped as well, and the I ist goes on.

1 have been riding bikes since I was syears old. My dad had an old Indian then and he used to sit me on the tank and ride round the old aerodrome we used to live by. My dad wasan engineer in the Royal Navy at the time and he gave me my first bike - an old parachute bike they used to use in the Army with an Excelsior engine and just two gears. It had an old tin can that used to hold about a pint of fuel for a petrol tank. He took the engine out and told me that when I could balance the bike and ride down the hill without falling off at the bottom he would put the engine in it. Took about two days and a lot of cuts and bruises, but her ass was mine. Been riding ever since and my old Dad, who is now coming up 80, was still riding his 900 Kwak 'til he was 75 - not bad for an old boy who had to retire at 60 'coz of rheumatoid arthritis in his neck.

Now I have a 58 plate M800 Intruder Suzuki. Yes, when you have all stopped laughing,got her brand new- walked in, pointed to the bike and paid cash for her. Old Ethel shines better now than she did when I bought her and runs like a dream. No, I do not ride her in the wet, not because I get cold in my old age but because I don't want to spend all week any more fixing wiring faults and blown lights and out of respect for the old girl. She never com plains, is always ready when I want to take the tarp' off her and go for a cruise down to the coast, pop up the tent and have a beer on the beach with my two sons and a few mates. She has never tried to d ivorce me and take my house. She corners like a dream and,yes, she still has standard 'pipes on her. But who gives a crap, I just want to ride my bike.

So the next timeyou see an old boy on an M800 Suzuki, remember this - he has probably been where you are goingand seen the things you are hoping to see, but this time he is doing it for himself and just likes to ride his bike the way he wants. And if that means I ain't a bi ker then so be it. The old boy who likes to ride his bike

Dear 100% Biker,

DearGod, I'm glad I waited - after reading Januar/s issue I was going to throw my toys out of the proverbial pram. I had thought for one moment that senility had caught up with me and I had picked up acertain other publication whose name we won't mention. Show bikes? Do what! Next it will be big bucks builds, endless pages dedicated to Mr Read and road tripsin the good ol' US of A done in a car.

However, fearye not, I have just read issue 127 (only 365 of her

Madge's pennies and worth every single penny one so it is) and there is not one bike in the whole magazine I would n't object to giving house room to - the Mrs can sleep in the shed!

Carry on chaps, spiffing, top hole and all that. So keep it real and keep it coming

By the way, where's Goldfish gone? Drew

Write us a letter and we will stick ithe're

Dear 100% Biker,

I would like to thank everyone who has helped me with my recent charity tour playing bagpipes for NABD (as in issue 128).

Special thankstoCaroland Peter at FVMCC for letting me use the club rallies, and also Bernie McPhillips who used to be with NABD and helped me start this off.

I would like to thank everyone at NABD for sending me a nice framed certificate for myacievementsand everyone who donated their money. Also a big thankyou to 100% Biker for the coverage you gave me - it was niceofyoutodoit. Thanks again to everyone. Love Kayla Cochrane (age 12)

PS. I loved readingabout Nik's island trip in Scotland lastyearand have just read about the start of the latest one in the newest issue. I like to read and see the pictures of places I have been to (especially the food at the Green Wellie).

Dear 100% Biker,

I see in issue 128 that wee Nik is off yet again on a jolly to Scotland. Has this man no work to do??

I think the crew at 100% should send him and his rat (and any slackers in the office!) to Hell and Back - Hell being a small town in Norway just north of Trondheim.and Back 128 miles east in Jamtland in Sweden. Cam

Me and the rat (and Budge and Gaspode) have been to Sweden, Cam, and it was a great laugh - we went to the Nortalje Chopper Show and they didn't know what to make of two mega-rats, they really didn't. N.

Dear 100% Biker,

I would just like to say I agree with Pieman's & Lil' Billy's letters (issue i28)-lliketothinkofioo%Bikeras the bike parkers' mag, in so much as while the Harleys are good to see, most are not rideable. I spend most of my times at shows lookingaround the bike parks where the real chops and rats are and this is where 100% is the better mag than the rest on the market! That is why I subscribe. I do understand that it is really out of season for the rallies to have space in the mag, but I do flick through the Harley show pages as there is nothing there for me. I do have just a quick glance at some of the bobbers every now and then, but I preferthe photos of the bike park bikes!

The Sun is out again now so more photos of real bikes please - rats and chops and even everyday bikes with little mods which catch the eye, this iswhatyou are good at.

Also I have noticed that the women are also becoming more 'customised? You have had some crackinggirls on the cover, but also some who look too m uch I ike the Harleys they are sitting on - too much added extras?

Excellent mag, but let's have more REAL bikes, REAL women and REAL rallies - leave the unaffordable stuff totheYankiemags. Chris

Dear 100% Biker,

As an active member of the new MAG group in Towcester, it pleases me no end to see the MAG content in 100% Biker and your recent editorial mention of the Riders Are Voters (RAV) campaign. I am however disappointed to know that on ly about 2% of British bikers/riders are members of a riders' rights group.

What I do believe, however, is that agreater percentage of readers of 100% Biker will surely be full membersof MAG and loads of you will support MAG by attending many of the eventsand rallies. All I will ask is that, if you are not, then consider joining- it costs less than 50P per week, that's 2 fags or 1/6 of a pint of ale. In real terms, £25 per year. Lofty I

a bike however small the engine, and we had to start slowly whilst he rode off quickly. This wasjust one of the ti mes his road sense was lacking.

Stop starting was another minor hazard we encountered. Once when lost on adual carriageway, with cars overtaking the van in a constant stream, he slowed to about 25 mph and waved us by. How we avoided an accident from the side or behind was extremely lucky. These were just two of his stupid antics that messed us around. Not to mention Liverpool...

North of Perth our patience had been worn out and with being lost etc there was nowhere near enough ti me to get to John O'Groats as planned. It was H IS decision to abort andHISfaultwehadto.

Agreed the camera was faulty from the start, that was unfortunate. The anti-shake was faulty.

He questioned the health of both of us. We were fine to continue, but became increasingly frustrated and annoyed by his bad riding. The previous year we had laughed off most of his inept riding. He takes no advice on his riding as he knows it al I. He rides through red lights, and rides on dual carriageways that state 'no learners'. If he ever passes his test it will be a miracle!

We did not travel to Lands End the night before, as HE could not find any accommodation. We are not sure which bikers thought thedriver was not fit as we did not meet many, and it was the driver who unloaded his bike for him for the start. We were both fine to take on the tri p, and looking forward to it, but hoped that his ridingand road sense had improved from last year.

The two interviews en route, as we had been told, were for HIS benefit -we were not even invited. We did the sensible thingand looked forfood and drink. We also met some people from the * 2008 trip.'I am being interviewed'he said. No problem, we ' thought. Atnotimedidheaskwhy we were not at his interviews.

The final straw was at Squire's Cafe near Leeds. When we left after he had his interview he rang his partner for a postcode for the B&B that was four or five minutes down the road. She gave it to us and we ended upin Leedsabout 16 miles away at a two star hotel! He said that she had not made any mistake with the code...

The supposed electrical problem existed, but was not permanently fixable. It had been an intermittent fault throughout the return journey. Whilst stopped we had aquick forty winks. The ride was now in an unredeemable position and we were fed up with him so drove back to Plymouth so as not to prolong OUR agony any longer. The worst trip ever!

He had been ridingfor DEBRA in '08 and in '09, but as the lady was not there to meet him after this last trip, he ditched DEBRA. We found out that she had some urgent family problems. How could she snu b such a man?Thus all the money raised went to Diabetes UK without informing anyone! Thedriver arranged for all the fuel sponsors, in aid of DEBRA,so if he found anyone to sponsor his fuel that will be a fi rst.

If this is his last on L-plates is he getting rid of his bike?Orgoingto ride pil lion to someone else? We cannot see h im passing his test, especially after following him for manyhundred miles. Two very disgruntled ex associates

Dear 100% Biker,

Following Stuart Morrisse/s (Madrider 1961) less than complimentary letter in Bulging Sack we, the Support Crew, would like to answer his waffle.

The ride was aborted because he kepttakingwrongroads - one of which took us 60 miles off course. This obviously added a lot of time. We had to follow speed limits and on many occasions he had to wait for us. It is not flat all the way you know. Unfortunately, usually at the start of an incline, he would wait and take off as we got close to him. The van does not have the acceleration of

Thanks to the lovely people at Oxford KM Products (www. Ug oxprod.com or 01993 ™ 862300) the best letter each month will nowwin ; oneoftheircoolnewBoxBX-

2R helmets. The BX-2R is their latest . full face lid and has been designed to a very high specification. It hasa lightweightsyntheticshell.aquick-releasevisor.a removable lining and two ventilation points to both duct air in to cool your sweaty bonce and also whisk away the hot air too. Ifs also ACU Gold certified so it's perfect for use on track days or at dragstrips too. It comes in fivecolours- black, red, pink (for the ladies!), blue and matt black (probably the most popularcolour with you lot!) -and wouldsetyou back £69.99 if you had to buy one but,as I said, each month one lucky so-and-so will get one free,gratis and for nowt! Y'spawnyget!

IT'S ALWflys SIX O'CLOCK IN HELL APPARENTLY)
Motorcycle Trike Traders

^ 3rd,4th &5th September, tickets available now book online, by post or phone. See www.storminthecastle.co.uk for further details

wwwstorminthecastle conk

Wilton Castle Country f^rk. Wttton-te-Wear. Blstiop Auckland,CMmtir Durham. DIM ODE General Enquiries / Ticket line: 0870 225 8352 Traders & Caterers: 0799 052 6596 lit Adult pre-book £25.00. Children 5 to 15 £5.00. Car pass £35.00 strict limit of 150.

On tlie gate £35.00 (Only available to those arriving on a bike or trike.1 See website lor latest updates. A lundraising event lor Motorcycle Action Group, run by Stormin' the Castle Ltd

Tho National Association for Bikers with a Disability Invite you to attend their Summer rally for 2010

Trossachs 4

The Drymen Showfield, Stirling, G63 0HU

Live Bands and Disco • Traditional Rally Bar Custom Bike & Trike Show • Custom Bike Show Prizes donated by WKS?

Advance Tickets: £12 (or £15 on the gate). Car Parking £5 (free with blue disabled badge). Vans & Caravans £10. Limited day tickets will be available. Site opens on Friday at 12noon. Strictly no fires and dogs except guide dogs. Advanced ticket orders and stall holders pitch info from NABD By The Trossachs Rally, Unit 20, The Bridgewater Centre. Robson Avenue, Urmston, Manchester M41 7TE.

Cheques should be made payable to NABD. Ticket orders by credit card Tel: 0844 415 4849 or via the online shop at www.nabd.org.uk

NO! Alcohol will not bo permitted through tho gate at wo will be selling a good selection ol beers wines and spirits at good prices. Remember, this Is a fundraiser tor NABD. all profits from the bar help toward adapting vehicles for disabled riders.

All proceeds to ensure freedom and indepanctence for disabled btKers The NABD is a registered charity (NO 1040907) Contact the NABO ofice for more rriormatcn 0844 415 4949 [email protected]

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